About Me

Listen up

John Doe

BIO

I'm 6'4, 73 pounds and I love rollerblading at night with my family. In my spare time I like to study old commericals for clues. I was once yelled at on a boat and I didn't even do anything wrong.
As a master of academia, I actually get paid by the government to solve philosophy riddles part-time.
I'm trapped deep inside of an ancient computer and get all my basic nutrients from Youtube prank videos.

Moorpark College

Graduate

I graduated from the prestigious Moorpark Community College with an associates degree in 'Behavioral Science'. Does that make me a good person? Probably, but it also means that I bailed 85% of the way through a degree in political science and decided to get a degree in the next closest thing.
Put simply? I spent a lot of time in the Humanities building and now I'm allowed to read any book I want for free.

Keller Williams - Real Estate Team

Director of Marketing

I spent many years toiling away at a comfortable desk, creating flyers and updating CMS databases for a small group of weird real estate agents. I learned a lot about marketing and graphic design, and had a lot of time to teach myself how to use Photoshop, build websites, and write a professional sounding email. Do I think the real estate industry is largely predatory and unnecessary? Of course. Do I also value my time spent there? Of course.

UBuildaBook

Account Manager

I worked as a marketer/graphic designer for a book publishing company that focused on yearbooks. I realized here that my technical design skills were not great and was lucky enough to force the resident tech guru to teach me how to prepare images and PDF's for high quality mass print jobs. I learned a lot more about Photoshop, Illustrator, and various other image editing software.